My real name

being evil was a search for true benevolence,

all my freedom was bought with credit, my time was my way

-you can’t get away with this,

remember, it’s only a matter of time

where will you run to ?

-the boss says its OK, that’s me

why would you do that to yourself,

-your freedom was bought on credit

breaking even seems like a gamblers nightmare

I think we all have problems, it just manifest its self differently from person to person. To be honest I have a problem with the way my body thinks, I have a tendency to over think “out”, and anyone who says they’ve never had a thought of doubt in them or their ups and downs seems a little unreal-

Anyways you should think about it, and if you want a thinker I’m here-

although you might not have what it takes not to be, maybe there’s much more things that are greater for you to become? and just being able to be is something you can do along the way to achieving that. beauty is temporal- for humans on the outside, and inside so it should not be a lasting desire but merely something to show sequence in life-

sadness can be engulfing like the stank humidity of an undersea city, with just one search for happiness the sadness can be confronted, even when its OK , one can sink into the depths of the sadness, even when ushered through the impossible one still will be engulfed within the difficulty of it, -happiness can be found in sadness sinking to your death a fight against the sadness can be futile.

this letter is from yesterday- and the day falls short of its time,

when had this all begun, yesterday-

and it was

in the stream of consciousness that freewill is not present

oh’ the beauty of the form

you don’t understand my words-

a love letter from yesterday, tells you nothing about the day

or much about what it meant

perfection leads to determined outcomes

the only way to execute freewill

she taught me to be patient

she showed me passion and guided me in a violent manner

then remember when you were young-

she taught me humility and exploited my evils

legends are forever, sometimes forgetting is forever and forgiveness comes in the end

but in the new beginning

the moon was mine and my wild crazy thoughts swirled

exposed its light- the reflection was mine

she taught me to care for my self,

take care she whispered

and deviated me from my own ideas

and this is my parting letter

the words that will tell you the other place is (ok) for me

it’s important to say because we never wanted to stay-

the best gift was that of everything and everything is nothing all at once

fear was what they made me feel and others felt my wrath

take me home and let me show you who we could be when we don’t worry about anything and everything-

don’t laugh you’ll be there one day (where now we go, you will too)

and to say it was said before has no meaning when no one can speak in the nothing

and everything is said and still nothing is heard the same- silent noise

 fooling on hills

He’s a scared man

half way to being who he is

half way gone from where he came from and who he was

that’s the choice the ultimate joist

the hitch is made and its pull, is loaded

the person he had become had come to soon and just a bit late,

the duality of the good and the bad

grabbed a hold of his heart and drained its’ romance

and it is a confusing story to say the least and death was on the horizon

like to have something you had no idea of.

The after reflection in pride, and shame.

With all admiration in the world ,

there is nothing like loyalty,

a gracious resolve, and a reservoir of hope.

lets revisit the topic

its circular duality of opposites

we can start off with a definition

following through only to redefine concepts

only static things are perfect

once again subscribe to the rule

there is no better there is only different

double trouble of a reality bubble

we desire reflection of who we are and are not

he was addicted beyond hitting rock bottom,

because

responsible addicts plan for the circumstances

and

the apathy is alienated amongst all chains of denial

so

as addicts do they reason and turn fate into faith

but

when he knew it was too much, he traded his addiction

because

all else failed except for obsession

and

confessing his withdrawals, the only thing he had, left him-

so

self destruction comes quick and -contrary to a steady pyramid

because

even the best can become opposite to themselves

It was my turn to say sorry-

but have you ever thought that people lie.

So whats in a word, a string of letters uttered by a voice.

What does it matter if belief is lost from the beginning?

Apologies are just masks of the true issues at hand, that for some reason can not be discussed?

More questions arise from apologies, why would you say that?

First and foremost there is a disconnection. What are we talking about? If one person for any reason doesn’t say what is needed they have nonetheless showed a reflection of the truth the obscure reality that occurs simultaneously to everyone. It is hard to believe that a reality apart from the life one person lives is consistent. All your thoughts may be in tune with the harmony of living but, still- what’s in a word called sorry? How can you say there is no real way of knowing that nothing has to be said, and the mystery will always remain as much as it will ever of the alternatives. When two people pass each other- they don’t even notice one another. A long long long time ago two people passed one another, and the time is sold to the past- it is unassuming, where does it all vanish? To the place before our birth. A short time from now the death of reality will happened and sorry isn’t a word, it means nothing and explanations don’t face anything but the individual.

Following the footsteps, left a path to be followed, even though the person leading didn’t know the destination. So many times we leave a trail for others to follow and it’s disguised because its visibility need not define it- the search provides a delivery for its introduction.

Mandatory sentence of formulated words. Even with the reserved patience of proper behavior, leads will be taken. Value judgments will be made, to outline our moral characters.

When the feeling is understood the loneliness of all the people will be prejudicial.